Cloudy Days - New Energies

Here I am, a 50+ year-old woman living alone (with my pet cat - a Zen Master) in an apartment building full of college age adults. I call them "kids." They're half my age and young enough to be my children. New energies...body piercings, tattoos, Mohawks, Dreadlocks, Gothic clothes, baggy pants, metal studded leather collars, metal disks stretching ear lobes, entirely new language. "Rad," "bitchin'," and "dank" all mean the same thing. Depending on your generation or phase of vernacular, they mean that something is really "cool" or "hot." Or they could mean that something is "groovy," or really "smooth." I LOVE the new energies! The young adults are all so full of vibrant life and are fearlessly heading off into directions and horizons I've never dreamed of, and I've learned tremendous, valuable lessons from all of them.

I often sit out in front of the building and smoke and catch tenants walking in and out. Many often stop to share a smoke and brief conversation with me. For me, the four-floor elevator ride and clamor of Main Street traffic are well worth the sojourns. This morning was no different. At 9:30 on Saturday mornings the city is already wide awake and on the move. Aromas of hot waffles, bacon and coffee along with the hum of conversations drift to me from the patio diners in front of the cafe 10 feet to my right. The font door of the apartment building swings open-and-shut as tenants come and go.

A young man steps out. No tattoos or body piercings, but definitely new energies surround him. We don't know each other's names but we're on weather update speaking terms. The sky is overcast with heavy but broken clouds. Glare and sudden bursts of streaming sunlight await all who emerge from the dim recesses of the building.

"I didn't know it was so bright out here," the young man said to me in passing.

"It's the glare," I confirmed.

"Actually, people get more sun on a cloudy day like this than on a sunny day. They don't realize how much they get. It's because sunlight comes in at odd angles between the clouds, it hits and bounces off all kinds of things. You can be sitting under the shade of an umbrella..." he nodded towards the diners in front of the cafe, "and you can still get burned from the reflected rays."

For some reason, that caught my attention. I asked him if he'd read about it somewhere and he said, "I'm a lifeguard at the pool. I know all about the sun."

This brings me to my point. New Energies.

We've read about them, talked about them, and experienced them. Yet, how many of us really know what's going on when we're so often confused or troubled by them; when we're bounced from highs to lows, from feeling joyful to feeling miserable? The energies seem to be hitting us from all directions with no sense or definition...Just like the reflected glare of the sun.

From my perspective, I see all humans as spiritual beings. Each soul is brilliant, like a magnificent sun. But for many, there are layers of separation between their conscious thoughts and spiritual awareness. You can call these layers "veils of separation," or "the dark night of the soul," or "ego." You can call the layers anything you want. I think of them as clouds, obscuring the sun. They're all the same thing. And, to coin an old (very old) term, we're going through another "Age of Enlightenment." (The other "Age" that I'm referring to occurred in the American Colonies during the Industrial Revolution, mid to late 1700's). Spiritual light is breaking all around us. Layers and clouds are starting to shift and separate. In ever-changing patterns, they're breaking up, reuniting, and moving on. The light around and in us is growing and reflecting, resonating with, and responding to the refracted rays. Light is coming at us from all directions. Each of us, as a spiritual being, is radiating more from whatever position we happen to be in at the moment. Energies are colliding and coalescing in all kinds of wavelengths and from multiple directions, at all speeds, faster and faster.

Can we slow it down? Sure, but I wouldn't advise it. Can we alter the courses? Doubtful. Do we want to? I don't. Even though I also rise and fall with the wavelengths and get confused or discouraged from time to time and get banged around a bit, I'm learning to recognize when I'm bombarded with multiple energies from multiple directions. I'm learning to trust myself to deal with what I can and let the others drift or zoom or bounce by. I'll catch them on the rebound. Throughout all these changes, I play different roles.

Sometimes, I'm like a lifeguard. I understand what's happening and I make allowances and sidestep pitfalls. Sometimes, I'm like a sun-bather, not fully understanding all the actions of UV rays, but understanding enough to manipulate them to get a desired tan. Sometimes, I'm like an "unseasoned" seaside visitor, not knowing anything about what all the sun can do, but loving how it feels, and getting burned to a crisp in the process.

What do I do when this happens? First, and foremost, I love myself - with my heart/soul, not with my mind or through the veneer of emotion. I recognize that I am the Blessing of God that I have created myself to be. I am a human being. With this love, I find self-forgiveness. Through self-forgiveness, I experience my innocence and purity. From this purity, I come to experience my Birthright of Nobility - that of being human - or that of human being. With this, comes spiritual growth and enlightenment, in whatever way or form that I choose and that I can handle. Through Love, all things are possible.

Love yourself.
Enjoy.
BE!


(c) Ronnie Carroll
August 2008

http://ronniesperspective.bogspot.com
www.soulsolutionshealing.com

The Probability of Possibilities

I have recently read that belief isn't as much an acceptance of what can be proven, but rather, an acceptance of what can't be disproved. This is the Shift. In this, we are shedding the constraints of limitation ("I won't believe it without proof") and we're stepping into the limitlessness of possibility ("I see no reason not to believe it"). In a sense, it can be thought of as a shift from rigidly clinging to only what is probable to a looser acceptance of what is possible.

From this perspective, the Shift isn't something that is simply happening; it's something we're creating.

I like to view the Shift as a portal - a doorway of sorts, to an alternate vibrational frequency or "higher level" of awareness. So, in that sense, the Shift can be viewed as some thing that already exists that we are heading towards. Yet, doorways serve no purpose and have no use unless we walk through them. So, our creation of the Shift isn't that we make the doorways (which have always existed), but that we allow our consciousness to see, understand, and use their existence. We aren't creating the doorways but we are creating their functionality.

I make a distinction between consciousness and awareness. To me, consciousness is what the mind or intellect can logically grasp and assimilate. It is a thought-driven knowledge of our world and ourselves based on the data we receive through our five senses. Awareness is the inherent, limitless knowledge of the soul without words, without thought. It is an awareness of Being and of infinity. It is an inherent knowledge of the things beyond our conscious comprehension. Spiritual growth is simply removing the filters or veils of separation between spiritual awareness and intellectual consciousness. It is stepping through the portals from one realm to another. It is the Shift.

Humanity has always been shifting. Each person shifts at his own speed, in his own way, in his own time. But, what makes the Shift seem so real to us now is that we're becoming consciously aware of our conscious awareness. Science - quantum physics - is helping our consciousness and is greatly speeding up the process. Explorations of the sub-atomic realm are allowing us to perceive that which has always been un-perceive-able. To those who still cling to the "I won't believe it without proof," science is now offering the proof. One step at a time, we're being drawn through the doorways.

Many years ago, I wrote a "tidbit" of philosophy that says: "To deny the laws of physics is to deny the existence of God." When I wrote those words, I had no idea just how true they were. For me, the measure of truth is how well a belief endures the test of time. Does something remain as true or sound today as it did years, decades, or centuries ago? If so, then for me - for the time, it is truth. In this case (of my philosophy), the truth is even more true for me today than it was years ago when I first wrote it. Yes, even philosophers can continue to learn from their own words. But, over the years, as I have more fully embraced my truth, I have battled what I identify as disappointment - a "let down" so-to-speak. For me, I can equate this disappointment as a type of fear. It isn't fear as in "terror" or what's "scary," but fear as in not wanting to let go of what's been comfortable and consciously accepted all my life. What lies behind the door that I'm about to open? Once I step through it into the unknown, will I ever find my way back to the known?

For most of my life, I bought into the mass consciousness that God was some sort of perfect, omnipotent, all-powerful, all-present Being. Outside of myself. Something to aim for. But, as I began to remove filters and walk through doorways and journey on my Shift, I began to hear what my soul (my spiritual awareness) was telling me, and what quantum physics is starting to prove and is starting to be incapable of disproving. God isn't just in everything, God IS everything. God is the existence of existence and nothing doesn't exist.

Existence exists.
Nothing doesn't exist.
Well, DUH!

Contemplating these simple concepts is akin to contemplating infinity. I have spent years contemplating infinity and can spend many more years doing so. Infinity is, after all, infinite. The "nothing" concept of infinity is easy for me to explain. (Some could even argue that I have spent years contemplating nothing). We, as humans, only have a concept of nothing simply because we don't (or can't) perceive everything. So, if we perceive a void between any two points, perhaps it isn't because there's nothing there. It may be only because we don't perceive anything being there. My spiritual sponsor once told me that if the nucleus of an atom were enlarged to the size of a basketball, then the closest orbiting electron would be 30 miles away. Thirty MILES! What, in God's name is in all that space between the nucleus and the electron? If God IS all things, then the void isn't empty. It's full of God. Nothing doesn't exist.

Perhaps the space is full of parallel universes. This is something that quantum physics is starting to explore. Tests and experiments have been conducted over and over and over again, all with the same result; our known world at the sub-atomic level is being "interfered with" or impacted by another universe (or other universes) that are parallel to ours. Does this sound far-fetched? How many basketballs can you squeeze into a circle with a 30 mile radius?

Just think of the possibilities.

(c) 8/17/2008
Ronnie Carroll

http://soulsolutionshealing.com

Speak Not of Love

I once approached a Master
who sat quietly on the floor;
a tunic and a turban
were all the Master wore.

I said, "After many lifetimes
I've finally come to see
that Love is not an emotion.
It's the only way to BE."

The Master sat in silence
and gently clasped his hands,
then spoke one word to mystify -
he softly whispered, "And?"

I did not linger in his presence.
In confusion I withdrew
to re-assess all that I felt
and everything I knew.

I'd first hoped that the Master -
a Divinely Loving man,
would give to me his wisdom
and share his "Master Plan."

I had come to see that the Master
had a tremendous sense of wit
and laughing with mirth at spirit,
was his approach to it.

So, was he laughing from his prank
to send me on a fruitless chase
to search for an answer I'd already found
by dwelling in God's grace?

But a Master will not cause one harm
or limit free will of choice
or in any manner restrict one's growth
or deny another's voice.

So, I journeyed far in search of Love
and sought all truth of Being
and through it my horizons grew
and expanded my scope of seeing.

I found that on my spiritual road
there are many paths that turn;
not to confuse or lead me astray
but to show me new things to learn.

And so I've learned, and so I've grown
and so, I've traveled far.
I've learned that all things shouldn't BE,
but only that things ARE.

And in the midst of this spiritual way
I've felt Love for all that IS
transcending joy, transcending peace,
transcending hope and bliss.

I have no words to name the Love
or to speak of how it feels,
but I know in the core of spirit's depth
it's the EVERY thing that's real.

And if ever again I find the Master,
of Love, I will not speak.
For it's a mystery that can't be told.
It is Truth of all we seek.

The Music of Spirit

We've all had experiences of listening to a beautiful piece of music and being carried away on its melody or rhythm. Sometimes, when the piece ends we seem to "snap out of it" and say to ourselves, "What happened? Where was I?" or "I don't know where I went but it sure was great!" Regardless of the precise thoughts that brought us back to our physical worlds, we knew, without doubt, that we'd been or had gone somewhere; and that the "somewhere" certainly wasn't here.

For me, this was what happened when I journeyed "to the other side." I don't want to call it a "Near Death Experience" (NDE) or a "life after death experience, because I learned - I experienced beyond any possible doubt, that life never ends. When life never ends, there's no such thing as "near death," or "life after death," or even "life after life." There's no after-life because there's no end to life. We've all heard this. We all mentally or intellectually understand this. But, how many of us wonder what really happens? How does it feel to exchange the physical form of life for an energy form? What is the experience like?

We are energy beings. It's just that our energies are condensed and vibrate at a "lower" level than spiritual energy. From my perspective, it's the same theory as light. We see a partial spectrum: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet. Yet, at the lower end of the light spectrum there's infrared and at the higher end there's ultraviolet. They exist and are as real as all the other wavelengths, but we don't see them. In the same manner, we can't hear the ultra low tones that whales can hear or the ultra high tones (whistles) that dogs can hear in the spectrum of sound. In the spectrum of spirituality, there's physical form (imbued with spiritual energy) and there's pure spiritual energy. We're much more aware of the physical form because we experience it through our five physical senses. It's only when we're conscious of "higher" vibrations that we become aware of spiritual energy.

So, my "journey to the other side" was simply being conscious of the shift of my energy vibrations. These journeys happen to people who achieve deep levels of meditation. They can also happen when you hear a piece of music, or whenever you experience a deep, peaceful bliss and you "go away somewhere." During these times, we're spiritually aware of the journey but, we may not be mentally conscious of the shift and of the journey. It's all about maintaining consciousness. This explanation takes away the "magic" and "mystery" of spiritual transcendence, but there's nothing magical or mystical about spirituality. We are spiritual beings and being spiritual is our natural state of being.

When my journey "to the other side" began, I heard music. As I lay in a hospital bed and gazed out at the pre-dawn gray of the world, I heard classical music. At first, it seemed so faint that I wasn't sure whether I heard it or only imagined it. So, I focused on it more intently and began to shut out the rest of the world. As the music grew louder, I thought it was being played over the intercom system. I silently applauded the hospital for having the good sense to play classical music and I also applauded their taste in it. It was like no music I'd ever heard - celestial, straining, and beautiful beyond description. It seemed to tug at my heart, so I followed it - with my heart.

We've all experienced tugs to our hearts; perhaps when we've held a sleeping baby or watched a kitten tussle with a ball of yarn, or gazed at a puppy through the window of a pet store. These "tugs" are the callings of our souls and are the energy wavelengths which we use to communicate with the spiritual nature of sentient beings and inanimate things around us. We communicate through resonance. Those vibrations that tug at our hearts (souls) are what vibrate within us, are generated by each of us, and characterize in part, the make-up of our souls/spirits. If we find ourselves responding in anger to someone else's anger, it's because our vibrations resonate with the vibrations of anger. If we relate to and respond to vibrations of harmony or compassion, it's because that's the resonance and vibration, or energy "wavelength" of our consciousness. Whatever it is - however it is structured or composed, it is ever-changing.

We respond to what we resonate with. We resonate with whatever we carry within us. This is why it's possible to be instantly attracted to, or repulsed by someone we've never before met. This is why it's possible to walk into a room or a home and sense the negative or positive energies within it, or to begin a course or series of actions and then sense or feel that they just aren't right. Many times, we have no proof or explanations to validate our feelings but we know, without doubt, they are true.

We are receptors as well as transmitters of energies. We are energy beings and we respond to whatever energies resonate with us. If we experience a negative situation and react to it with more negativity - even if we do something constructive (such as clean the house or chop wood to blow off steam), we are still transmitting and continuing to generate energies of negativity. If we take a moment to love and bless the food we are getting ready to eat, or the clothes we're getting ready to wear, or the car we're getting ready to drive, those energies of love will bless us again in return because we resonate with the energies they contain.

The energies that we maintain become our consciousness. They are, in a sense, the music of our spirit and the song of our soul. Our consciousness is our identity - that sense of self within ourselves; the eye of the I. When we physically die, we leave behind physical matter, but we take ourselves - our identities - our consciousness with us. The composition of our consciousness is always our choice. If we spend our lives focused on fear, responding to it, and dwelling in it, then fear is what we'll experience because it is what we resonate with. We all know that we can't run from our problems. So, what makes us think we can run from our fears when we transition? Likewise, if we spend our lives focused on love, then we'll experience a transition of love, because we recognize and resonate with the energies of love; they are what comprise the content of our consciousness.

So, look within to your own consciousness. If you feel peace and joy, strive to maintain an abundance of it. If you feel disquiet or discomfort, seek to change the composition of your consciousness. Focus on love. Focus on coming to know yourself - with love. Focus on the music of your spirit and let your soul sing.

Desire

The following is more-or-less a transcript of a conversation I had with my friend, Gabriel...

" 'Want' and 'desire' are two entirely different things," Gabriel said. "Want implies lack. Whenever you daydream about having more money, you also daydream about having things that you lack."

I nodded, secretly hoping that we wouldn't get into discussing some of those things I'd daydreamed about -- mansions, yachts, exotic pets, and all the accoutrements that came with them.

"Have you ever daydreamed about the things you already have?" Gabriel asked, snapping my wandering thoughts back to the present.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"Have you ever daydreamed about the furniture that you already own, or the pictures on your walls, or your knicknacks?"

"No. But that doesn't mean I don't want them."

"That's exactly what that means. Think about it. Before you came into possession of those things, you wanted them. When you obtained the things you wanted, you stopped wanting them. Substitute the word 'lack' for the word 'want.' You lacked something so you obtained it. Once you obtained it, you no longer lacked it."

"I still wanted it. I'm not in the habit of expending effort and money to obtain something that I want and then throwing it away just because I no longer want it."

"You're speaking of desire."

"You're using semantics," I countered.

"Think about this. Do you make an effort to own -- or do you even wish to own, everything you see that's pleasant or pleasing in some manner -- hot sports cars, elegant evening gowns, an island paradise, museum gallery artwork, a beautiful sunset?"

"Of course not. Besides, you can't own a sunset."

"Does that mean you don't desire it?"

"No. But that doesn't mean I don't want it either. Or, to use your words - I don't 'lack' it."

"Exactly. When you see a beautiful sunset, you feel you don't 'lack' it because...why?"

I thought about this for a moment. "Because I'm experiencing it."

Gabriel smiled. "That is desire."

"Are you saying that desire is experiencing something that's pleasant?"

"In part. That's why you don't throw away the new furniture or sports car that you just bought -- because you still desire it. Desire is all about feeling. Lack - or want, is all about having or not having something. Let's consider world peace. People want world peace because they perceive a lack of it. Then, let's say that all the people in the world find a way to live peaceably with one another, and everyone is happy with it. They still desire it. Whether or not world peace, or a beautiful sunset, new furniture, or new car is obtained, it is still desired. When you want -- or lack something, and the want is fulfilled, the want -- or lack, no longer exists. All that remains is desire."

"So," I spoke slowly, thinking about my words as I said them, "desire is more than an experience, it's a feeling."

"What's the difference?" Gabriel asked, throwing another curve ball at me. "How can you experience something without feeling it? How can you feel something without having some sort of experience associated with it?"

"Are you saying that desire is only something that you experience?"

"It's what you feel."

"So, using your words, one can say that God doesn't 'want' us to be happy or spiritually fulfilled," I said.

"God has everything because God is everything," Gabriel reminded me. "Since God is everything, God experiences all things. Experience is feeling. God doesn't want what God already has. God does, however, desire all things."

I thought about this several long moments. Finally, a peace -- an understanding began to fill me. That's when Gabriel smiled and vanished. Only the warmth of his smile remained.

Desire.